Tag Archives: coronavirus

A Covid Infection Anniversary

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Picture of a covid molecule.
Photo by CDC on Pexels.com

This week marks 1 year since I caught covid, which became Long Covid.

Song of the post: Virus by Del The Funky Homosapien · Dan The Automator · Kid Koala on Deltron 3030.

Lat year in 2022, during the Omnicron Surge in the middle of January, I caught covid at work.

It may seem strange that I am giving my catching covid an anniversary… The concept is most known for getting married, being at a job, or being a marker of success for relationship longevity. Since I have read The body keeps the score, I’ve learned that those under the effects of PTSD can hold up traumatic events. Between catching covid, living in a pandemic, and still randomly suffering from long covid, it’s no wonder I’m feeling off today.

I caught covid at a pizza party I threw after my first week as a department manager. While everyone then was wearing masks, and to my recollection, the majority wearing kn95s… I could have been safer and limited how many people with masks down were getting food in our small breakroom. Masks are useless if they are pulled down when people are eating. It didn’t help that the space where I set up the pizza was in our work breakroom, which is tiny and has poot airflow (still). I probably should not have brought the leftovers home and eaten them later. (Even if I did reheat and store them properly, that was too risky.)

I should have been more persistent in getting the booster shot then. I was not boosted because demand was so high in my area. The new covid booster had just become available in December 2021. Nowhere I called or looked had open appointments. The only way I could have received it was to drive to every pharmacy and wait until it closed, after work, for there to maybe be an extra shot.

Now that I think of it, I could have died if I did not have the original vaccine series.

Other factors that didn’t help:

A) I was exhausted by keeping up with safety after 2 years;

B) I wanted to treat everyone at work to pizza (people pleasing);

C) to that point in time, we had not had a work party, and I had barely socialized with anyone outside my immediate social circle.

20 minutes with my mask down/off to eat pizza in a closed space with many people, during peak covid infections was all it took.

This short post below I wrote in the middle of it when I was home sick.

https://unknownreilly.com/2022/01/22/i-caught-covid/

Since it’s going on year 3 of the pandemic, let’s review what catching covid feels like

To begin with, I am not a Doctor. I am a blogger. This list is from the CDC:

Symptoms of COVID-19

  • Fever or chills
  • Cough
  • Shortness of breath or difficulty breathing
  • Fatigue
  • Muscle or body aches
  • Headache
  • New loss of taste or smell
  • Sore throat
  • Congestion or runny nose
  • Nausea or vomiting
  • Diarrhea

source: https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/symptoms-testing/symptoms.html

I would add symptoms: Feeling so tired that you can’t focus or do anything but rest, confusion, rapid or slow heartbeat, and the worst fever you have ever had.

If you are sick and suspect it is covid, STAY HOME. The U.S. government is giving away free covid tests here. If you test positive, stay home for 14 weeks. 5 days with a mask is not long enough. Even going to work with a mask on is like having a loaded gun where your mouth is. even if the safety is on, it’s still loaded. A loaded gun that is pointing at others. Your mouth doesn’t have a safety switch, and people make mistakes.

Don’t risk your health. Take your time to recover and prevent the spread to others, please.

Do you really want to put your health in the hands of the American healthcare system?

A reminder on how to properly wear a mask:

How to properly wear a face mask guide https://news.sanfordhealth.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/019037-00405-FACEBOOK-INSTA-SHN-COVID-19-Face-Mask-crop.jpg

This is what the symptoms of Long Covid are

AS is currently understood by science and those suffering from it. Research is underway to treat Long Covid and how it attacks the body.

“Long COVID (sometimes referred to as ‘post-acute sequelae of COVID-19’) is a multisystemic condition comprising often severe symptoms that follow a severe acute respiratory syndrome coronavirus 2 (SARS-CoV-2) infection. At least 65 million individuals around the world have long COVID, based on a conservative estimated incidence of 10% of infected people and more than 651 million documented COVID-19 cases worldwide1; the number is likely much higher due to many undocumented cases. The incidence is estimated at 10–30% of non-hospitalized cases, 50–70% of hospitalized cases2,3 and 10–12% of vaccinated cases4,5. Long COVID is associated with all ages and acute phase disease severities, with the highest percentage of diagnoses between the ages of 36 and 50 years, and most long COVID cases are in non-hospitalized patients with a mild acute illness6, as this population represents the majority of overall COVID-19 cases. There are many research challenges, as outlined in this Review, and many open questions, particularly relating to pathophysiology, effective treatments and risk factors.

Hundreds of biomedical findings have been documented, with many patients experiencing dozens of symptoms across multiple organ systems7 (Fig. 1). Long COVID encompasses multiple adverse outcomes, with common new-onset conditions including cardiovascular, thrombotic and cerebrovascular disease8, type 2 diabetes9, myalgic encephalomyelitis/chronic fatigue syndrome (ME/CFS)10,11 and dysautonomia, especially postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome (POTS)12 (Fig. 2). Symptoms can last for years13, and particularly in cases of new-onset ME/CFS and dysautonomia are expected to be lifelong14. With significant proportions of individuals with long COVID unable to return to work7, the scale of newly disabled individuals is contributing to labour shortages15. There are currently no validated effective treatments.”

Source, Nature.
Covid can: Take your breath, change your mind, make your skin crawl, break your heart

Long covid is considered a disability under the ADA:

“This guidance explains that long COVID can be a disability under Titles II (state and local government) and III (public accommodations) of the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA),3  Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act of 1973 (Section 504),4  and Section 1557 of the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act (Section 1557).5   Each of these federal laws protects people with disabilities from discrimination.6   This guidance also provides resources for additional information and best practices.  This document focuses solely on long COVID, and does not address when COVID-19 may meet the legal definition of disability.

The civil rights protections and responsibilities of these federal laws apply even during emergencies.7   They cannot be waived.”

Source

Why should I be worried? I don’t have long covid, and its been 3+ years into the pandemic?

Concerns over Covid spike in China grow ahead of Lunar New Year

https://www.nbcnews.com/now/video/covid-spikes-in-china-grow-ahead-of-lunar-new-year-159860293630

‘People aren’t taking this seriously’: experts say US Covid surge is big risk.

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2023/jan/15/covid-19-coronavirus-us-surge-complacency

WHO urges travellers to wear masks as new COVID variant spreads.

https://www.reuters.com/world/whoeurope-backs-travel-checks-us-given-spread-latest-omicron-variant-2023-01-10/

Biden administration renews Covid-19 public health emergency.

https://www.cnn.com/2023/01/11/politics/covid-19-public-health-emergency/index.html

All around the world, covid surveillance is faltering.

https://web.archive.org/web/20230108140811/https://www.economist.com/science-and-technology/2023/01/04/all-around-the-world-covid-surveillance-is-faltering


Labour Party calls for mask wearing on public transport and crowded places until March 1 amid virus surge

https://www.independent.ie/irish-news/politics/labour-party-calls-for-mask-wearing-on-public-transport-and-crowded-places-until-march-1-amid-virus-surge-42275572.html

Where to get vaccinated:

The price of getting a vaccine is going up.

Companies look at increasing price of their COVID-19 vaccines. Bernie Sanders is not happy
While insurance will cover the shots, premiums could rise, the senator warned.)

Get it while its free and affordable.

In the U.S.:

https://www.vaccines.gov/

Worldwide:

https://www.who.int/emergencies/diseases/novel-coronavirus-2019/covid-19-vaccines

Get Boosted! Let this be the last pandemic winter…

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When is the end? #covid19

Only about 14% of the United States has the latest covid booster vaccine.

The pandemic isn’t over for me. Long covid is hellish.

I’ve accepted my lot living with long covid. This is my fate. I don’t like having it. I want to feel like I did before, I took being healthy for granted. This is what acceptance means to me. I have a chronic disease, and this is my life. I have a disability due to this.

Your energy still isn’t back to 100%.

You get tired easily.

Your heart rate varies.

You are short of breath.

You get sick easily.

Simple exercise wears you out and can knock you out for days from exhaustion.

Your trust in humanity goes to zero. How can you fully trust anyone when anyone can spread covid to you?

Covid can: Take your breath, change your mind, make your skin crawl, break your heart
Source

I’m tired of the pandemic too. But we ain’t quite out of the pandemic woods.

That major outbreak across China is an ominous sign. A new covid variant is sure to originate from that. Fuck, we were so close to the end of the pandemic. One more winter and it felt that the worst was behind us… I wouldn’t have to fear catching it again while vulnerable. I would rather avoid potentially shortening my life like that.

https://theconversation.com/there-are-still-good-reasons-to-avoid-catching-covid-again-for-one-your-risk-of-long-covid-goes-up-each-time-196041

https://apnews.com/article/science-health-china-covid-306b688d84e31a9462f82d0ead1f4584

For everyone’s sake… Please get the Bivalent covid booster!

Here is where to get vaccinated:

https://www.vaccines.gov/

https://www.who.int/emergencies/diseases/novel-coronavirus-2019/covid-19-vaccines

The Fog

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Fog on a highway road.

The Fog

Thoughts, disorganized.

Energy: Low.

Waiting to be tested at the doctors to see what’s wrong.

Not that there is a cure.

Prognosis for future: bleak.

That was true before Long Covid.

Irregular sleep.

No dreams.

Past trauma replaying on loop in mind.

Is therapy helping?

A little bit.

The fog will clear.

One day, life will be sunny again.

Living with Long Covid

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Picture of the eastern side path of Seward Park
Picture of the eastern side of Seward Park

Song of the post: The Four Seasons – Summer – Allegro non Molto. By Antonio Vivaldi

I took my physical health for granted

I caught the coronavirus in January 2022, during the omicron spike in the US. I saw it at work after I bought pizza for everyone on the first Friday of the week I was promoted to department lead. (Which later changed). My place of work is a tiny building, and the break room doesn’t have excellent airflow, so I likely caught it there when everyone was eating… Masks down. I can’t remember if I went outside to eat. Everyone was vaccinated, and some were boosted; I wasn’t boosted due to the high demand during the winter Omicron surge. While we have safety measures at work, and ownership was generous to offer us a couple of hundred dollar bonus for the initial vaccine, there never was a booster policy. I, along with others who were concerned, asked, but it never became a requirement.

Mid-January, I caught coronavirus and was out for two weeks.

I wasn’t boosted for lack of trying. I could have gotten one if I had shown up to specific locations with extra shots after they closed. The fact is that I didn’t. Testing at that time was complex; you had to go to a drive-thru location and hope they had open appointments. This was before the at-home tests became widespread in the US.

I haven’t been the same person since

Today is one of many days that I have had to call out sick because of Long Covid symptoms. I took a short hike with my mom on Sunday afternoon at our favorite local park: Seward Park. It’s a park on Lake Washington in Seattle, close enough to walk to, an excellent workout that will leave you sweaty, and a good couple of miles with varied terrain. I used to be able to walk there, walk the loop around the outside of the park, and back. Since January, I can walk 10 minutes on flat terrain and be okay.

Up until July, I could go to work and back on most days and crash when I get home. Combine this with the depression, anxiety, inflammation flareups, and PTSD as a result of how about a third of the world refusing to vaccine or distance… Or another third not putting on their mask correctly, and brain fog. And I haven’t followed up on treatment. Which didn’t yet exist because this condition is so new.

On Sunday, I went on a short, roughly 30-minute hike with my mom at Seward Park.

Turtles on a log on Lake Washington, from Seward Park.
If you zoom in, you’ll see several turtles on the log. From 2021

A refresher on Long Covid Symptoms

From CDC.GOV

General symptoms

  • Tiredness or fatigue that interferes with daily life
  • Symptoms that get worse after physical or mental effort (also known as “post-exertional malaise”)
  • Fever

Respiratory and heart symptoms

  • Difficulty breathing or shortness of breath
  • Cough
  • Chest pain
  • Fast-beating or pounding heart (also known as heart palpitations)

Neurological symptoms

  • Difficulty thinking or concentrating (sometimes referred to as “brain fog”)
  • Headache
  • Sleep problems
  • Dizziness when you stand up (lightheadedness)
  • Pins-and-needles feelings
  • Change in smell or taste
  • Depression or anxiety

Digestive symptoms

  • Diarrhea
  • Stomach pain

Other symptoms

  • Joint or muscle pain
  • Rash
  • Changes in menstrual cycles

Post-exertional malaise

In the past 8 months, I have had all of these symptoms except for rash, change in smell/taste, and menstrual cycles (for obvious reasons). The most common are: fatigue after effort, difficulty concentrating, sleep problems, and diarrhea. I have slowly gotten my energy back, and have more good days than bad, yet the condition hangs on.

On Sunday, I decided to go on a walk in Seward Park with my Mom. One of the things that my therapist suggested was to spend time in nature. When I was in therapy the last time, going to the park and walking for exercise did help. I have gotten out of doing both of these things due to my health. It has been a long time since I pushed myself to exercise. I have been doing short ten-minute walks a couple times a week at work. What was I talking about again? Oh yeah.. The walk at the park.

Dory, a metaphor for brain fog.

The Park

From Wikipedia: Seward Park is a municipal park in Seattle, Washington, United States. Located in the city neighborhood of the same name, it covers 300 acres (120 ha; 0.47 sq mi). The park occupies all of Bailey Peninsula, a forested peninsula that juts into Lake Washington. It contains one of the last surviving tracts of old-growth forest within the city of Seattle. The park is named after U.S. Secretary of State William Seward. The 300 acres (120 ha) of Seward Park have roughly 120 acres (49 ha) of surviving old growth forest, providing a glimpse of what some of the lake shore looked like before the city of Seattle was founded. With trees older than 250 years and many less than 200, the Seward Park forest is relatively young (the forests of Seattle before the city was fully mature were usually 1,000–2,000 years old).[1] Source

The Walk

Normally this walk, this is as the cliche goes… Is a walk in the park.

“walk in the park”:

Something that is easy to do or accomplish.

https://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/walk+in+the+park

Normally, or life before I caught covid, I could easily walk any route around Seward Park and back. I would be sweaty and be tired from a long cardio workout, but nothing that I couldn’t recover from. If I would go the long route, walking there and back, on the longest route, this would be about a 60-90 minute brisk walk. Which has always been doable, even in recent times where I have been out of shape.

Ever since I caught covid in January, and later Long Covid, I haven’t been physically able to exercise outside of work and every day chores. Since July, I have been able to do 10 minute walks on breaks a couple times a week. So, I thought it would be okay to try some longer exercise.

That was a mistake.

I was mindful to pace myself and to not overdo it because I hadn’t pushed my body this hard in months.

Yet, after 15 minutes of slowly walking through the evergreen forest and windy trails common to the inner forest path we chose, I was dizzy, wheezing, my heart was pounding, and I had to stop to catch my breath. I felt like I was hiking a mountain or sprinting at full speed, not shuffling along like a snail on a gentle park trail. I have walked this trail and others in the park several times a year during the summer, every year of my life without any problem.

Turtle crawling slowly through sand

This time, I felt physically like I did shuffling around the hospital wing after I had a couple heart attacks as a severe side effect of Amphetamine based ADHD medication at age 22. (Thankfully I recovered, there was no damage to my heart, and all tests after said I was healthy). It was a struggle and I felt weak after. I really hope these current symptoms are not current heart problems because of Long Covid. I don’t get treated. I am more afraid of the insane cost of treating chronic health problems in our messed-up healthcare system.

Thankfully, my mother drove us to the park. I would not have been able to walk back.

Monday was Labor Day, so this was a short work week. Even so, I was only able to work two half days. All I could do Tuesday morning was to drag myself to shower and dress before I was too exhausted to continue. Even though I have slept more, and taken it easy, I’m still not recovered as I write this today, the following Saturday. Work has been great with my health issues, with me missing so much time this year and I’m very grateful to them for that. I’ll always have a little fear of being fired, even if there isn’t evidence that I will be, but I am glad to have their support. Thankfully, I have sick leave accrued, so I’ll be okay this time.

I contacted my doctors office, and did an E-visit checkup. There still isn’t a cure or a specific treatment for Long Covid, but they can treat symptoms. Hopefully I’ll get some answers at the next in person appointment later this month. Just like the pandemic as a whole, I have to wait for an unknown time for this to be over. Maybe this is how my life is from now on.

Distant hope for the future.

Yale researchers discover potential Long COVID causes and treatments

All things considered, my life is alright. I’d like it to be better, to be different. The struggle with this chronic condition is so hard. Especially because there isn’t a cure or specific medical treatment yet. A lot of days, I wonder if what I’m feeling is due to this condition or a flare-up of the preexisting depression or anxiety that I manage. Well, one day at a time. I’m so tired of being patient. I’m so tired of chronic health conditions that I have little control over. Thanks for letting me vent a bit.

It took me much longer than usual to write this week. It’s hard to write when your health gets in the way and you need to prioritize that. Do you or anyone you know struggle with Long Covid? Let me know in the comments! If you like this and are a new reader, subscribe below and checkout my latest posts! Thank you for reading!

Shifting Winds

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Lake Washington at dusk, looking South. My Rainier in the distance.
Lake Washington at dusk, looking South. My Rainier in the distance.

Progress is Progress

Life lately has felt like being in a foggy blizzard. Piercing cold, hard to see around you, challenging to traverse, and slow trudging through knee-deep as snow. (Not that my sheltered ass knows what this is like… It just felt relevant. Such is creativity.)

Long Covid as a foggy blizzard

Since I last tested positive for covid, I haven’t fully healed. The worst has passed, and I’m grateful for that… But covid hangs on. Fatigue, brain fog, occasional dizziness, and shortness of breath rarely.

I suspected I had long covid, seeing as it’s been seven weeks. This explains why I’ve felt fatigued so quickly. Why was I briefly sick last week (a cold or food poisoning?)? Today I had it confirmed at a doctor’s appointment. Any symptoms after a month post-infection are considered long covid. It takes an average covid infected person like me three months to fully recover. All I can do is continue to focus on healing. I believe this is the longest I’ve been consistently mindful of daily. I’m slowly walking through the grief from getting covid, despite doing everything I could all through the pandemic, from the suffering of (likely) catching up at work. My past hard work of going to therapy and improving myself is paying off. A massive silver lining to surviving covid is that I’m not paranoid-terrified of covid anymore. It is still wary of social distancing and any place filled with people. I’m alive. While the pandemic isn’t over yet, hopefully, the worst is over here in the US.

One upside to this is that I stopped smoking weed while sick. I might have to stop because I physically feel worse after permanently. I do enjoy pot, but not the smoking aspect. I don’t enjoy being way too high. I certainly abused it in the past. It was and is helpful sometimes, but I don’t need it. So, a better compromise would be edibles. I can control the dose and responsibly enjoy it.

It’s frustrating that I likely caught covid from buying lunch for everyone my first week. Tight quarters with poor ventilation, lots of people in a small space with masks off… Even though everyone is vaccinated. Even though we distanced while eating, I’m lucky to be alive and fortunate that nobody else got infected. Shit… What a colossal mistake I made. Probably pandemic fatigue on my part, still… It’s my fault.)

The foggy blizzard of Long Covid will soon pass too. Not if I fight back. It doesn’t feel like it; we’re all frostbitten and weary. But this will give. Progress.

If you're serious about change, you have to go through uncomfortable situations. Stop trying to dodge the process. It's the only way to grow.

Here comes the New boss, same as the Old boss. 🎸🎶

I didn’t realize until today that I risked my life for my job. Why? Because they treat all of us well. As a lead, though, I have a different perspective. I’m grieving the loss of the old and processing the grief of failing. Oh, and figuring out my new job.

I failed as room lead, and it’s my fault. After three weeks (interrupted by having covid) and a month of training my coworker-replacement, I was moved into a new role at work. I’m still in management; now, I’m not overseeing employees much. It makes sense. People skills aren’t a strength of mine. Before I knew I was autistic, I assumed it was inexperience. That is part of it… It’s the recognizing emotions in myself and others that trips me up.

I did everything they asked. Sometimes it doesn’t work out, or another person is better suited for the role. This became a learning experience.

Rule with an iron fist, lead with a velvet glove.

Plusses–

  • Learned how to manage quality problems when a disaster happens before you touch the product, then how to get the most out of it.
  • Starting a new job where I’m learning on the fly, having to lead people as a manager when I was previously an employee,
  • Met the future production goals most of the weeks I was lead or co-lead under my watch.
  • I created a production tracking sheet.
  • I learned how to navigate relationships with other managers by practicing communication skills and how to receive feedback on my actions.

Minuses

  • Need to work on my communication skills.
  • I need to work on managing my emotions.
  • Understand the company “setting” before trying to change the “mindset.”

In short, my inexperience and weaknesses created this failure—this learning experience.

Gloved hand holding a bud of Guava Gelato cannabis.
Weed strain: Guava Gelato

The life long inner journey

It’s time to return to therapy.

I can’t ignore or procrastinate on being autistic any longer. I feel it became an obstacle in my previous position. I couldn’t learn about this the past few years due to the pandemic and the lack of social situations necessary to grow. Well, maybe there was a handful with all the zoom therapy groups I did. A time or two at the jobs I had. Nothing consistent. Because I couldn’t relax and be comfortable that I would be working after three months, I had the Neurotypical mask on. This is a psychological “mask” autistic people put on to blend in with nonautistic people.

Along with autism, I still have other issues to work through with a therapist. I needed time after work with my previous therapist to give myself a break after all we had accomplished together. And I needed time to iron out significant problems, such as finding consistent work. It’s time. I loathe navigating my health insurance plan for mental health coverage. So far, it’s useless and doesn’t cover shit. It’s all I can afford, and other programs aren’t better in this price range. Fucking greedy, selfish billionaires.

I’m the only one who can change myself. I’m responsible for myself, and nobody is going to stop me. I have to stop myself. I have to save myself.

The Pandemic Blues

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The Pandemic Blues

I’ve got the pandemic blues

Gonna need a third shot while the rest of the world waits for one

Seems the world’s falling apart anyway

Not slept well… since I don’t know when

The time before feels so long ago

Been ready for this to be over

The Delta rages in The Delta as people lose their minds plugged to their tvs

Faux fox Hocking lies to feed the bottom line

Who cares who dies as long as their free

People stressing me out not wearing masks right

Cover your mouth, cover your nose

Open your eyes, open your ears

Can’t you see the children dying?

Can’t you hear our pleas for help?

You ain’t listening, you ain’t paying attention

I ain’t playing politics, I’m trying to save your life

Guess it’s impossible to change the mind of fools ~

Stay 6 feet away

Keep the disease to yourself

You’ll be sorry some day

Cause now that I know how you really are…

Im free while you’re willingly in chains

All I can do is shake my head and wish you well

Thanks for reading! This is the first time I’ve posted something like this (made up lyrics), so tell me what you think in the comments!

2020’s Last Impression.

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2020:

January: The beginning of the end

I hit my goal of working for at least a year at one workplace. Despite all the friends I made there, it was time for a change. At the end of the month, the company closed and everyone was laid off. I’m glad I worked there, and grateful for all the friends made there.

About 5# of cannabis sugar leaf to be ground into a fine ground product for joints.
What it looks like to receive weed at a legal weed company.
The last one was a joke meme I posted at work. Everyone got sick at work in January. Thankfully it wasn’t covid…

February: Where one door Slams shut, others open.

Old friendships end in an awful way. I never did end up apologizing to that person. I wish I said “I’m Sorry, I can’t do this anymore. I won’t enter your house again, or bother you again.” It’s best we went our own ways. “Sometimes it’s best to leave a relationship broken, than picking up the pieces and hurt yourself. I had to face reality and move on.”

I wasn’t alone anymore because the truth set me free. There was no way for me to continue on like none of this happened. That end marked new chapters with new friends.

March: the Pandemic Saga begins

I was pretty useless in March this past year. I was heartbroken from the rejection-breakup. I had to reevaluate my entire life and life choices because of that loss. I was grieving the death of my 18 year old kitty from December 2019, I was grieving being laid off from a job I liked. It was extremely stressful at home as Mom and I adjusted to being around each other all day at home. I had a nervous breakdown on day two of a new job at the end of February and had to quit that job. I felt suicidal… This time I asked for help from Mom and I went to the hospital. Because of this difficult experience, the psychiatrist there pointed me to the right help. At home, I lived on the couch in comfortable pajamas, wrapped in a blanket. I split my time on the phone, or watching relationship and psychology videos on YouTube. I started seeing my current therapist in March, and started doing groups over zoom too. As of the date of this post, 12/31/20, I haven’t met my therapist in person yet. It’s been a weird year for therapy. Oh and I started this blog on 03/27/20!

April: Bargaining & Depression

Looking back in my journal, I was torturing myself with excessive blame and trying to right my sense of sanity. Worse yet I had to deal with all this grief in a pandemic world away from family and friends. Weekday zoom therapy groups became my social life.

May… More of the same

It was still early into my recovery phase. But this month produced two of my personal favorite blog posts this year:

https://theunknownreillyblog.wordpress.com/2020/05/01/blue-sparkly-shoes/

https://theunknownreillyblog.wordpress.com/2020/05/29/not-a-eulogy-a-letter-of-hope/

June: Comfort eating

Brownies, roses, poetry, and Anthony bourdain oh my!

https://theunknownreillyblog.wordpress.com/2020/06/07/brownies-for-a-friend/

July: The long summer part 1,2, and 3

August: The long summer parts 4,5, and 6.

September never ends: The long summer parts 7-10.

Gumpa passed away at age 92 in September.

October: part 1 of the 2020 election.

November: The election parts 2 & 3.

December: It doesn’t feel like the end.

Happy new year!

Thank you for reading this, if you enjoyed it, please give it a like, tell me what you think in the comments, and share on Facebook. Don’t forget to subscribe to my email list for updates! 

Please wear a mask outside that covers your mouth and nose, wash your hands, clean your cell phone, and keep your physical distance (6 feet) from others to fight Covid-19! 

© Reilly Anderson. 2020. All rights reserved.

Every blog post in 2020! Happy New year!

Xmas come early? Covid test negative!

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Christmas tree 2020.
The Christmas tree.

Breaking news…

I think… I have a girlfriend. 😳 The mysterious woman I met on Tinder that I’ve blogged about recently. We have communicated thus far over WhatsApp, but haven’t met in person yet because of the pandemic, and this new relationship. I’m euphoric that this is happening, and incredibly anxious because I’m worried she might reject me. I haven’t had a girlfriend before and now that’s so close I’m worried. It feels too good to be true… My dream of finding some I love, that loves me too is coming true. That also wants to meet in person. All of my suffering and hard work to become healthy has meaning. Because I earned meaning by being persistent. In my romantic life, 2020 has felt like a classic Romantic Christmas movie…. A Cinderella Christmas story for me? 2020 has also taught me to be patient, and be bold too. Please let this be real!

It’s been such a long time since I could jam to this music. Omg it’s really happening!

Covid test result: negative!

I got fantastic news today, I had a negative test result, so I don’t have Coronavirus! This is also true for everyone at work! I’m grateful for this! This means that I can meet my new beau in person soon. I’m so excited!

My love life is in bloom.
This is the first selfie I’ve felt confident about my looks in a long time.

The end of the Tinder saga?

Today I got rid of all the dating apps I had on my phone. It was nice to get so many matches on Bumble, and even 1 on Hinge, but I’m a one woman man. Omg I can’t wait to see what life has next for me and my new lady. What an amazing turn of events!

Have love and a girlfriend is a thing I’ve secretly wish for as a Xmas present for years. And it’s here? Woah.

Previous December Blog marathon posts:

Thank you for reading this, if you enjoyed it, please give it a like, tell me what you think in the comments, and share on Facebook. Don’t forget to subscribe to my email list for updates!

Please wear a mask outside that covers your mouth and nose, wash your hands, clean your cell phone, and keep your physical distance (6 feet) from others to fight Covid-19!

© Reilly Anderson. 2020. All rights reserved.

A cold, coronavirus, or pandemic fatigue?

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Today, I’ve slowly felt more exhausted over time. I hope this isn’t from covid. I haven’t had the energy to do anything but watch football games. I did some stretching earlier in the day, and that helped a little bit with my sore muscles. There isn’t a reason for this exhaustion or sore spots. Hopefully this congestion I have is due to allergies.

Maybe my body is finally processing the stress from the 2020 election since the Supreme Court threw out a recount in Texas. It won’t feel real until January 20, 2021 when Biden becomes president.

Symptoms:

  • Fatigue
  • Muscle soreness
  • Congestion

That’s 3 symptoms of coronavirus according to the CDC. It’s now been 8 days since I was exposed at work. I’m still waiting on results from the test I took on Friday. So, I’m staying positive, hoping for a negative!😅😷

https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/symptoms-testing/symptoms.html?CDC_AA_refVal=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.cdc.gov%2Fcoronavirus%2F2019-ncov%2Fabout%2Fsymptoms.html

Online dating:

Last Sunday, I deleted my Tinder account. Overall, I had 4 matches with real people, and 8 with fakes. Of those 4, only 2 actually met my preferences. 1 ghosted me after a little bit, and the last one I’m still talking to.

I felt like deleting it because I hadn’t had a new match in weeks. I didn’t feel like paying another $10 on top of the $30 monthly fee for super likes. It felt like most of the women I swiped were super popular users. So the only way to stand out was to pay more just to be able to send a message. No thanks.

In Tinders place I’m trying Bumble and Hinge (again). I’ve had a Bumble account for a while, with no luck… Until today when I discovered I had a match. 🙂 I swiped right today, so now I have to wait 24 hours for her to message me. Seems to be the story of 2020… Patience and waiting.

December blog marathon posts:

Thank you for reading this, if you enjoyed it, please give it a like, tell me what you think in the comments, and share on Facebook. Don’t forget to subscribe to my email list for updates! 

Please wear a mask outside that covers your mouth and nose, wash your hands, clean your cell phone, and keep your physical distance (6 feet) from others to fight Covid-19! 

© Reilly Anderson. 2020. All rights reserved.

Waiting for results

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Can't see the forest from the trees while I wait for my covid result...

Waiting for a Covid test result…

I got a covid test today.

It was simple as calling the doctor’s office yesterday, and getting an appointment.

I drove to the facility and parked at a designated parking spot. I arrived to nab the one open space. Three white tents with a taped piece of paper: call ***-***-**** to check-in.

I open the phone app on my phone, and enter the phone number. As it connects, I press speaker option. Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring… Nobody is picking up. The parking lot is about 80 percent full, and it’s 110pm, so they must be busy. The call ends.

I connect bluetooth and put on the Cloud of Unknowing.:

It’s a somber, soulful song which matches my worries. I don’t know how this test will turn out.

I call the number again, and check in. Now I have to wait.

I don’t have long to worry, as the man in the car in the parking spot to my right has a medical professional approach his car. The professional is wearing a white lab coat, N95 face mask, a plastic face shield, and disposable gloves.

I pause the music to observe.

The man in the car opens the door ajar, wearing a baby blue disposable mask. The professional explains the procedure to him.

Put the swab in each nostril and swab inside each for 15 seconds. Then you hand the swab back to her with your mask back on.

He finishes his test, hands the swab to her, and she tells him to expect results in 2-5 days depending on how busy the lab is. The man asks about work, and the professional says that the office will write a letter if requested for a positive result.

A moment later, the medical professional repeats the covid-19 test procedure with me. She ends with “Until you get your results, act like you have it.”

I drive home. Pondering my life. While it’s unlikely I have it, and there is a high chance I recover, I could die. I could die in the next two weeks.

I feel like I’ve barely become an average man. Never known romantic love, what it feels like to achieve a dream, never been independent, haven’t even had an amazing date… Haven’t had sex.

Is this really it? Is this really the best I could do in 34 years?

I’m trying to be positive about my life. But I’m not satisfied how it is. I hope my destiny isn’t to die from covid.

Thank you for reading this, if you enjoyed it, please give it a like, tell me what you think in the comments, and share on Facebook. Don’t forget to subscribe to my email list for updates! 

Please wear a mask outside that covers your mouth and nose, wash your hands, clean your cell phone, and keep your physical distance (6 feet) from others to fight Covid-19! 

© Reilly Anderson. 2020. All rights reserved.

Update 12-15-2020: Test results negative for me and everyone at work!